This is my initial voyage into this medium so bear with me if I don’t follow the typical pattern…but then that IS somewhat the typical pattern for me!
I am finding it difficult to locate a jumping-in point to this seemingly endless river of thoughts and ideas inside me. The river's swift current makes it difficult and this is compounded with a concern that I could easily paint some inaccurate picture of myself…some façade…when words on a page are the only brush and canvas with which I am to paint this self-portrait...and should I jump in mid-thought someone may think I am crazy...but that doesn't scare me nearly as much as someone thinking I am normal...eeekkk! I am thinking it will take some time to really do the job. But then if I am truly transparent on this path into the deep I will be defined more in the wake as the waves close behind me rather than by my focused endpoint. My point: I think oftentimes others do perceive who we are and what our impetus is and it is we ourselves that are clueless!
OK...so about me:
I am a spiritual person. I believe our life begins in the realm of the spirit, is affected by the realm of the spirit and our soul and spirit return there when the temporal portion of us fulfills its allotment in this dimension of time.
I am a passionate person. I feel and believe deeply and my convictions run deep. However, contrary to popular belief, I do not believe I have been everywhere, done everything nor have I bought every t-shirt that has presented itself along the way, thus I am open to conversation and debate on even the deepest levels. I feel that if we disagree on anything, our conversation, if civil and intelligent, will either expose my shallow deception or it will serve as a catalyst for my belief. If I am wrong then our conversation will have made me a wiser man, for which I may bark at the onset, but will be grateful. If my belief stands then I am stronger in it and thus less threatened and more understanding with others who hold opposing views. I believe that good, honest conversation can be like iron sharpening iron.
I am, at the deepest level of my being, a musician, a songwriter, a player of music and song. Within my heart, soul, mind and spirit is a seeming endless stream of melody, cadence and lyric. There is a part of me, deep within my soul and spirit, that seems to only find expression as I play on my instrument. But then, there is at least one other medium that flows from the innermost part of me though both are tied and flow together. I want to follow my destiny even though I sometimes feel like a salmon swimming against the current...
I am finding it difficult to locate a jumping-in point to this seemingly endless river of thoughts and ideas inside me. The river's swift current makes it difficult and this is compounded with a concern that I could easily paint some inaccurate picture of myself…some façade…when words on a page are the only brush and canvas with which I am to paint this self-portrait...and should I jump in mid-thought someone may think I am crazy...but that doesn't scare me nearly as much as someone thinking I am normal...eeekkk! I am thinking it will take some time to really do the job. But then if I am truly transparent on this path into the deep I will be defined more in the wake as the waves close behind me rather than by my focused endpoint. My point: I think oftentimes others do perceive who we are and what our impetus is and it is we ourselves that are clueless!
OK...so about me:
I am a spiritual person. I believe our life begins in the realm of the spirit, is affected by the realm of the spirit and our soul and spirit return there when the temporal portion of us fulfills its allotment in this dimension of time.
I am a passionate person. I feel and believe deeply and my convictions run deep. However, contrary to popular belief, I do not believe I have been everywhere, done everything nor have I bought every t-shirt that has presented itself along the way, thus I am open to conversation and debate on even the deepest levels. I feel that if we disagree on anything, our conversation, if civil and intelligent, will either expose my shallow deception or it will serve as a catalyst for my belief. If I am wrong then our conversation will have made me a wiser man, for which I may bark at the onset, but will be grateful. If my belief stands then I am stronger in it and thus less threatened and more understanding with others who hold opposing views. I believe that good, honest conversation can be like iron sharpening iron.
I am, at the deepest level of my being, a musician, a songwriter, a player of music and song. Within my heart, soul, mind and spirit is a seeming endless stream of melody, cadence and lyric. There is a part of me, deep within my soul and spirit, that seems to only find expression as I play on my instrument. But then, there is at least one other medium that flows from the innermost part of me though both are tied and flow together. I want to follow my destiny even though I sometimes feel like a salmon swimming against the current...
Labels: Maiden Voyage
posted by Vatic Favonian at 11:36 AM
1 Comments:
I've written several things about that struggle between who I am and what I must do to feed myself.
I especially relate to:
"I find it difficult to be so invested in what can be such a plastic, hostile world where a smile could mean anything and very little is what it seems or appears to be."
and it must be extra frustrating when you feel responsible for how our little office progresses, even though social currents are mostly beyond your control.
We appreciate you, though.
Perhaps this is not the most spiritually enlightened suggestion, but my theory is this:
the group that drinks/parties/unwinds together, works best together.
We need to get everyone out, somehow. It might help.
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